I recently realized my love doesn’t need me, causing a terrible, overwhelming feeling of emptiness inside. Not unlike Bella’s in New Moon.
I think this is the greater power showing me my true nature. That what I think I am doesn’t exist. And that love is always one-way. …No matter what you love, it will always spurn you and kick you while you’re down.
But I also think that if the greater power could speak, it would not tell me to run from the feeling and distract myself with activity. I think it would tell me to stand and face it, accepting the implications. …That no one can save me. …That we love in order to be disillusioned. …That the faster I can get up and do it again, the closer I can come to truly living.
